Wednesday, February 21, 2018

Friday, February 16, 2018


Why do I compose 10 entries per day in my head but can't think of a single thing to say when I actually have time to write?

I'm supposed to meet a friend in the morning for a walk, but I haven't sent a text to confirm it yet.  I'll do that as soon as I publish this post.

Ordered pizza from dominos tonight and ate more than I probably should have. But that's life.

Valentine's Day was nice. I got some sweets from my sweetie and then I gave him a card. 

Anything else? Oh yeah! The weather is beautiful, wish you were here.

Monday, January 29, 2018

What I'm eating

I love the idea of meal prepping for the week, but I just can't get excited to eat the same thing every day all week long.

But Sunday I put a whole chicken in the crock pot for dinner.  I'm using the leftovers to throw on salads for the next couple of days' lunches.

It turned out really good.  Just rub a whole bunch of spices (I used italian seasoning, paprika, salt, pepper, rosemary, and stuffed it with an onion) and let it cook all day. Delicious!

Have y'all heard of veggie tots?  I'm so addicted to these things and could probably polish the whole bag off in one sitting, but my husband helps me.

I know it's not as healthy as a plateful of steamed broccoli, but I'm going to enjoy my life.

Lastly, my Diet Coke addiction has now doubled.

Clearly someone needs to teach me how to rotate pictures.  hahah.  If you help me out, I might even share a new Diet Coke with you.  The Orange one was SO GOOD and so was the twisted mango.  I can't decide which one I like better.  There are a couple of other new flavors I'll have to try too.

Wednesday, January 24, 2018

I want it all or nothing at all

A million years ago I kept an online journal and every title was a line from a Bruce Springsteen song.  hahahhaa.  Gosh, my Bruce Springsteen phase was long and loud.

Anyway, I thought the line about wanting it all or nothing at all was most appropriate since my last post was about how precise I had been with my diet and exercise.  All it took was one Sunday filled with garlic bread and chips and dip to send me crashing down the diet mountain.  I've been in the throes of eating anything that isn't nailed down for the last couple of days.

I'm desperately trying to re-focus. It's such a struggle to teach myself to eat a "normal" amount or to exercise an "appropriate" amount.  I put those in quotes because what's normal and appropriate is different for each person.  I'm currently eating and exercising the normal and appropriate amount for a 230 pound woman.  UGH!!!!!

Thursday, January 18, 2018

Weighty Anxiety

This is something weird that I know has happened before, but I'm really trying to figure it out.  I have a  bit of anxiety revolving around my eating and exercise schedule.  Like I'm almost manic when I know I need to go exercise.  Or freak out that I might have eaten too many calories.

It's really not mentally healthy and I remember doing this when I lost 100 pounds in my 20s.  It's like I'm so militant that I can't deviate from my daily plan or I'll just give up and fail.

How do I make myself relax?

I've proven that I need structure to lose weight.  Obviously I don't know how to eat until just full. I wouldn't have ended up over 230 pounds if I knew what "just full" felt like. 

I've tried to just eat smaller portions and take evening walks, but it never lasts long enough to show results.  I guess I'll just continue on my current plan of eating 1600-1800 calories per day and exercising 4 times per week for now.  Although I'd rather be neck deep in fried chicken and corn bread.